Sunday, April 19, 2015

Title: “Look, Ma! BOTH hands!"

“LOST MUSKET DIARY” Sunday April 19, 2015
Sunny and Sight Haze 79°F/26°C in Rancho Santa Margarita
Buongiorno,
Something New
  On Tuesday, I was finally allowed to take my right arm out of its sling. At first it felt that my newly-repaired right wing would simply fall off my shoulder onto the floor. “Just let it dangle for a few minutes. Lean over the desk or counter top and wiggle your hips so the arm moves,” Ronny advised me. “Do this about five or six times a day. It’s still healing, so, go easy.” That was Tuesday. This morning, I was finally able to put my shirt on by myself and use both hands to pull up my shorts. Progress is Our Most Important Product, went GE’s old motto. A Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with a Single Step, said Mao Tse Tung as he set out on The Long March. For me, the road back began with a wiggling of the fingers on my right hand. Now, my right arm is again helping my left arm to pull my pants up.
  Ronnie Escudero is the Physician’s Assistant to my orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Jeff Sodl. He did my pre-op evaluation, assisted in the surgery, and checked me out two weeks after the operation. I’ll see him again in about three weeks. That’s not to say that the top guy hasn’t spent a lot of time with me, but I was unconscious for most of it. One of my last recollections I had before the anesthesiologist put me under was Dr. Sodl, Magic Marker in hand, asking me which shoulder he was supposed to operate on. I confirmed that it was my RIGHT shoulder and, he began to scribble on it. “There,” he exclaimed. “’X’ marks the spot with MY initials, so that I know I’ll get it right.” Gratefully, I slipped into unconsciousness. Sure enough. When I came to in the recovery room a few hours later, my right arm was in a big sling brace, and everyone around me was talking at once. “Can you wiggle your fingers?” someone asked. I wiggled my fingers. “Can you feel this?” somebody else asked as they started poking my arm. I nodded in the affirmative. Someone else pushed a button attached to a plastic tube into my left hand. “Here’s your morphine drip,” said another voice. “If you feel any pain, push the button.” Good to have it handy, but I have yet to experience anything beyond a mild discomfort during the whole process.
  Since, I’m not allowed to drive for at least the next month, I’m spending a lot of time at home, reading or writing for my blog or website, or yakking with friends via Skype or chatting it up on Facebook. Quite a bit of TV time, too.  Last weekend, I watched Harrison Ford chasing “the one-armed man” in the re-make of “The Fugitive,” and startled my poodle when I laughed out loud at the updated villain with his modern prosthetic arm, which only served to confuse our hero, Dr. Kimball.
  One item that crossed my desktop this morning was an email from one of my high school classmates, Judi Staib Harrison. (Our class held its 55th Anniversary Reunion in 2013, if that gives you an idea of just how far back we go together). It was another of Judi’s lists of what to expect when you get old, specifically, Perks of reaching 60 or being over 70 and heading towards 80: Now, I’m not going to burden you with the whole list, but, here are some that I especially like:
·        In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.
·        No one expects you to run--anywhere.
·        There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
·        Things you buy now won't wear out.
·        You can live without sex, but not your glasses.
·        You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
·        You don’t think of speed limits as a challenge, but as a goal.
·        Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
·        Secrets are safe with your friends, because they can't remember them either.
·        Most importantly, never, ever, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 
Oh, and lest we forget. On this Day in History:
1775 – Almanac says - American Revolution begins - Lexington Common, shot "heard round the world!” This, in spite of Longfellow’s account:
“Listen my children and you shall hear
Of the midnight ride of Paul Revere,
On the eighteenth of April, in Seventy-five;
Hardly a man is now alive
Who remembers that famous day and year."
Ciao,
MikeBo

©Mike Botula 2015

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